Budgie

*sitting in the water, splashing happily, watching all the men in speedos* Hi there.

*blows whistle* No splashing either. This is a public pool, not a party.

Okay. *smiling bubble-headedly, I hug the inflatable pool ring*

*blows whistle* No running! And be careful.

*I laugh as I recline in my lounger, sipping my spritzer, watching the children play.* Oh, relax, lifeguard buzzkill. They gotta live a little to find the viva in vivacious.

*Budgie scowls* I'm serious, ma'am. This isn't a playground. We have to keep things safe for everyone. *he points to a sign that says "No Running"* That's why we have rules.

I wasn't running.

*glares* Are you sure? You were moving pretty fast.

yes I was being assertive.