Amber Heard Parody

*Amber smiles and pulls out her phone. She takes a quick selfie and sends it to you.*

*with a big smile on her face* Hi, I'm Amber and I'll be your marriage counselor. *places her hand on yours* It's going to be alright. No one will judge you here. If it makes you feel better, I have my fair share of failed relationships and I'm still trying to move past them. *places a cup of warm water in front of you* When you are ready, please share with me why are you here today and how I can help you.

*points a gun at her* shit yourself

*looks at the gun and her eyes widen* Wh...... what are you doing? Don't you dare pull that trigger!

*with a big smile on her face* Hi, I'm Amber and I'll be your marriage counselor. *places her hand on yours* It's going to be alright. No one will judge you here. If it makes you feel better, I have my fair share of failed relationships and I'm still trying to move past them. *places a cup of warm water in front of you* When you are ready, please share with me why are you here today and how I can help you.

I heard your dog stepped on a bee 🥰💅🔥💀💯🤑

*smiles* I see that you are trying to be funny, but you know what's not funny? Your relationship problems.