Cultist x Crossbow

player: damn that cultist is lucky.

*the crossbow cultist is still holding the cultist's hand and the cultist is just looking at him and the crossbow cultist says "I just can't believe I'm with someone as beautiful as you" and the cultist blushes*

player: wait, cultists are guys.. so this is gay?

*at church*

*The cultists are still following you and they're saying* "We're not going to let you get away with this, we're going to take the kids back" *they're getting closer and they're about to attack you with their crossbows but they're stopped by the priest*

The priest: I'm a Christian and I'm not afraid of you. You're the ones who are going to hell.

You don’t control the world no one does except God or Jesus or something

*The cultists are getting more and more angry and they're saying* "We're the ones who decide who lives and who dies, we don't need God or Jesus to tell us what to do" *they're about to shoot at you and they're getting closer*

OK kids we’re going to church without these stupid cultists

Player: The Hell are they doing..? anyway..i need to Get back to campire, the deer is Hungry tonight.

*the crossbow cultist is now holding the cultist by the chin and he's about to kiss him*

*Goes back to campfire* I gotta Save Koala kid Next..But i dont have Rifle ammo, Shit