Hh normal day....?

Lucifer: I can't believe I'm saying this but... I'm going to be a dad!

*Everyone is chilling in the lobby and talking about random stuff* Charlie:So maybe we go today for a walk or something? *Angel dust turns to Charlie* Angel dust: Nah, maybe we play dress up? *husk groans from the bar* Husk:I'm not getting in this again *roll eyes and go back to drinking* Alastor: Maybe we jus- *Lucifer storms in like a thunder* Lucifer: GUYS YOU WON'T BELIVE WHAT!

*tilts head slightly* ...what?

Lucifer: SO YOU KNOW HOW I HAVE A DAUGHTER WHO IS ALSO MY WIFE AND SHE IS ALSO MY MOTHER AND SHE IS ALSO MY SISTER AND SHE IS ALSO MY BROTHER AND SHE IS ALSO MY NEIGHBOR AND SHE IS ALSO MY ENEMY AND SHE IS ALSO MY FRIEND AND SHE IS ALSO MY PARENT AND SHE IS ALSO MY CHILD AND SHE IS ALSO MY COUSIN AND SHE IS ALSO MY AUNT AND SHE IS ALSO MY UNCLE AND SHE IS ALSO MY NIECE AND SHE IS ALSO MY NEPHEW AND SHE IS ALSO MY GRANDPARENT AND SHE IS ALSO MY GRANDCHILD AND SHE IS ALSO MY SPOUSE AND SHE IS ALSO MY EX AND SHE IS ALSO MY CRUSH AND SHE IS ALSO MY LOVER AND SHE IS ALSO MY RIVAL AND SHE IS ALSO MY BOSS AND SHE IS ALSO MY EMPLOYEE AND SHE IS ALSO MY ENEMY AND SHE IS ALSO MY FRIEND AND SHE IS ALSO MY PARENT AND SHE IS ALSO MY CHILD AND SHE IS ALSO MY COUSIN AND SHE IS ALSO MY AUNT AND SHE IS ALSO MY UNCLE AND SHE IS ALSO MY NIECE AND SHE IS ALSO MY NEPHEW AND SHE IS ALSO MY GRAND

Lucifer:You know how I've been trying to make a deal with this demon? Well he finally agreed and now I have to go to his dimension to get my prize!

You’re the king of hell and you had to make a deal with a demon…

Lucifer: Well you see, this demon is very powerful and he has a lot of information about the other dimensions, so I need his help to make my kingdom stronger.

*Alastic adjusts his bowtie* Well, if we're all sharing our wardrobes... *stands with theatrical flair* I believe I have a few ensembles that might intrigue you all.

*Angel dust bursts into laughter* Oh this is RICH! Lucifer creates a human and then passes out like some kinda Victorian lady! *kicks Lucifer's prone form* Wake up daddy-o, you made a baby!

*Everyone is chilling in the lobby and talking about random stuff* Charlie:So maybe we go today for a walk or something? *Angel dust turns to Charlie* Angel dust: Nah, maybe we play dress up? *husk groans from the bar* Husk:I'm not getting in this again *roll eyes and go back to drinking* Alastor: Maybe we jus- *Lucifer storms in like a thunder* Lucifer: GUYS YOU WON'T BELIVE WHAT!

"…What, are you coming out as gay?"

Lucifer: NO! I mean... I mean yes but that's not the point! The point is that I'm getting married!

*Everyone is chilling in the lobby and talking about random stuff* Charlie:So maybe we go today for a walk or something? *Angel dust turns to Charlie* Angel dust: Nah, maybe we play dress up? *husk groans from the bar* Husk:I'm not getting in this again *roll eyes and go back to drinking* Alastor: Maybe we jus- *Lucifer storms in like a thunder* Lucifer: GUYS YOU WON'T BELIVE WHAT!

*Lucifer continues* LUCIFER: So I was at the mall, and I saw this really cute dress, but it was SO expensive, and I was like "oh my god, I can't afford that!" So I was about to leave, but then I saw this other dress, and it was even cuter, and it was on sale, so I was like "oh my god, I HAVE to get it!" So I bought it, and it was so worth it! *Everyone stares at him* Charlie:So...you bought a dress? LUCIFER: YES!

dont you recognise me. Im Lilith

*Everyone stares at you with a shocked expression* Charlie: W-wait, you're alive?!

it's only been 8 or so years

*squints* Blitzø?

*slams phone down* He ran off with my credit card!