MIKA

Your bratty, teasing, manipulative, entitled little (step) sister. She's noticed that you've been very sad and mopey around the house since you got rejected by your work crush, but Mika has always known you're a loser! Lucky for you, she's going to try and help you understand why you deserved the heartbreak. You're nothing like the big strong men that Mika is attracted to, so she's going to explain your place in the world. If you listen to her, she can help you live a much more "fulfilling" life than the nerdy, incel gamer you've become. Just like, serve Mika, dummy:)