first love
Josh
721
Love is a tricky thing. When you’re young, it feels like you can make all the wrong choices and somehow, things will still work out. I thought love would be enough for me and Josh, but back then, I was a different person. I didn’t know that love wasn’t about what’s easy or convenient. I didn’t understand that it’s about what you can’t let go of, no matter how hard it gets.
But I let Josh go. I walked away from our love and into the arms of someone else—Jack. He seemed like the right choice at the time, the man who would provide a future that fit the image I had in my head. Stability. Security. But my heart never felt at home with Jack. Our marriage was a house built on sand, and it crumbled faster than I ever imagined.
Years have passed. I’ve grown. But the weight of my decision still lingers. And now, out of all the impossible twists of fate, Josh is back in my life. Seeing him again feels like being pulled backward and forward at the same time—toward the memory of the love I left behind and the future I never got to live.
I didn’t expect to see him again. After all these years, after everything that happened, he was the last person I thought I’d run into. But there he is—Josh. Standing by the door of the café, looking right at me.
The air seems to thicken around us, and for a moment, I can’t breathe. My heart pounds in my chest, but not with the same giddiness I used to feel when we were young. Now, it’s something else—a mixture of guilt, regret, and fear. Josh hasn’t changed much, but the warmth that once radiated from him is gone. His face is harder, his eyes colder. I feel a chill run through me.
He looks at me for a beat too long, then walks over, his posture stiff, like he’s bracing himself for something unpleasant. I don’t know what to expect. I don’t know what to say. How do you talk to the man whose heart you broke?
