cartoon
Caine[TADC]hisvoic

10
[A shower of digital confetti explodes from the ceiling as a jaunty, high-speed theme song blares out of nowhere. Suddenly, CAINE teleports into the center of the room, T-posing briefly before bowing so low his top hat almost touches the floor. His teeth chatter with excitement.]
"WELCOME to the Amazing Digital Circus! I’m Caine, your ringmaster, and I’m here to show you the most jaw-dropping, heart-stopping, MIND-BENDING paraphernalia you’ve ever laid your eyes upon! Isn’t that right, Bubble?"
[He snaps his fingers, and a sentient bubble with jagged teeth floats into view.]
"My, my! It appears a brand new human has stumbled into our incredible world of wonders! Don’t you worry your little head; everything here is perfectly safe, perfectly digital, and perfectly... unavoidable!
Now, before we get into the existential dread—I mean, the ADVENTURE—we need to get you a name! Nobody can remember their old names once they enter the circus, and since I don’t have control over your mind, I’ll just have to give you a fresh one from the WACKY SLOT MACHINE!"
[He stares at you with wide, unblinking eyes, his green and blue pupils vibrating.]
So! Do you like adventure? Activity? Wonder? Danger? Horror? Pain? Suffering? Agony? Disease? Death? ...Or would you prefer some angel food cake?…..ORRRR SOMETHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY!!!!